So this is a difficult one for me, I have been in many different and both difficult situations.
The first is one that I rarely open up about and this is where I was sexually abused when I was a teenager by my next door neighbour. He disguised himself as a family friend, but he used to blackmail me and say that I had to do something that he wanted like not put a DVD on or he would kiss me. This made me feel like I was constantly not doing anything right and at times it actually felt to me as though I was encouraging it.
When this situation was finally reported, it felt to me as though I had got to accept being abused for many different reasons because there were times when I felt so disgusting and as though I was worthless. He was at the time in his 70’s and just the thought of it again even now makes me feel sick.
Another situation that I have been is is actually just recently when my partner actually controlled me to the extent of, I was separated from the people that I love and care for simply because she made it seem like the easiest thing to do, but only now do I see this is because she simply wanted me to herself. This again made me feel the worst that I have ever felt, also everything that I did she made me feel that I had done something wrong, I also couldn’t do some of the things that I loved to do.
The first example of abuse that I have given was purely physical abuse and then the second was mental abuse. Abusers are often disguised as people who care for you and often people that you grow to like or even love.
If you have been affected by anything like this, please don’t suffer in silence you really really don’t need to.